Thoughts J 90

Thanks.

2009-08-09T13:01:00.000-07:00

My wife will likely never see this blog. That's fine because she knows most of my inner desires. I started it mainly to get some of my thoughts out there, repost some old stories from other sites which had disappeared, and to get feedback. The last has been lacking, the first two not as much.

My wife has gone for a few days, but before she left, she told me that she left a bottle of nail polish (purple) in my medicine cabinet, that she wanted me to wear while she was gone, and for me to think of her while wearing it. That was very sweet of her.

A couple days before, we were playing the Wii, and she commented how she couldn't play the game as well because "something keeps getting in the way" - her chest. Then she said "you should see how it feels when we're gone". I said something, to which she told me that I heard her, and to try it (wearing the breast forms while playing the game). I was excited at that thought and I'll be doing that tomorrow or soon, but that's not the point of my post.

I know she isn't overly thrilled that I like breast forms. And before she dated me, she wouldn't have put "crossdresser" on the list of things she was looking for in a guy. She also isn't very dominant. That's at odds with some of the things I enjoy.

But we work together, give and take. She knows that I'll do things (solo) when she's not around, and is OK with that. She does things to make me happy / turn me on even when they're not things she'd necessarily enjoy. I reciprocate, of course, but it's good to have such a special woman.

I'm fortunate that I don't want to be a 24/7 female or have bisexual or polygamous desires. Either of those two would be a killer with my wife.

We get along quite well in non-sexual ways as well. There are a lot of people who have great sex, but can't stand each other outside the bedroom. If you're in a solid marriage/relationship, please appreciate what you have, even if she won't always be fulfilling your wildest dominating fantasies.

I guess what I'm saying is, I'm really lucky to be married to my wonderful wife.

What happened?

2009-07-20T17:38:00.000-07:00

I had a feeling someone would ask that!

Do you remember the breast forms I attached? Well, I do. The next morning, I went to take them off, and found that there was some discoloration on my chest where the forms were. I don't know whether it was from the attaching of the forms or the pressure from them or some type of blood under the surface, but that was the first time I had ever experienced anything like that. I've never attached that large a form before, but I stopped at that point. I'm better now.

I'm trying to periodically post information, stories, tasks and more which either were on the Internet but not anymore, or are hard to find. Here's one: this was from the sissystation mistress. Most people know of sissystation, but this was a task which never appeared on the main site. If anyone has done it or wants to, please let me know!

(Here's the sissystation mistress' task):
YOUR TASK
Do you admire long nails? Do you yearn for your own set of
immaculately manicured talons? Do you like the current fashion for
French manicures? Then this task will have you wetting your panties,
sissy.

You are to go to a beauty store and buy a set of glue-on nails,
finished in a french manicure. There may be a choice of designs - go
for a simple French or American manicure that looks like a
fingernail, not fancy patterns which just look cheap. There may be a
choice of length and shape. 'Active' and 'short' are quite short
(for a woman; still long for a man), 'natural' and 'glamour' are
longer. 'Oval', 'square', natural and 'squoval' are fairly obvious
to any dedicated sissy, I hope. Whichever you choose, they will feel
impossibly long, so I'm not going to insist you buy glamour or
natural length, although I'm sure some of you will. Do NOT buy stick
on nails, even if they state they are 'pre-glued'; these are rubbish
and will fall off within hours.
As you go to the checkout, imagine what the assistant will think of
your purchase. You can't pretend it's for a woman; men don't buy
nails as gifts. You can't pretend they're for a fancy dress party;
what real man would want glue on nails for a few hours at a party?
No, it will be obvious you bought them for yourself because you are
a sissy. To make certain, you must also buy a nail file specifically
graded for artificial nails. You will need one later. What you will
NOT do is buy nail posh remover.

Your new nails are designed for prolonged wear, so there is no point
wasting them in a short experiment. Your nails will last up to ten
days and, on this occasion, set aside at least two full days. Yes,
you are going to have long, feminine nails for at least 48 hours.
Sort them into sizes and try them on to select the sizes that will
fit your fingers. Remember to warm them gently first if you've
brought them in from the cold, or they will be brittle and will
split when you test fit them to your hands. If the size you want
seems to be between two of the sizes available, the manufacturers
advise you to file the edges of the larger sized nail until it is
the right width. Personally, I just wear the smaller nail; I seem to
press harder when I use glue than when I'm testing, which spreads
the nail wider. Don't go with the 'just too large' nail; it will
look dreadful - trust me.
File the SURFACE of your nails with the tool included in the nail
kit. Clean off the dust with acetone or a good rinse under a warm
tap. Allow your nails to dry so you don't glue in a pocket of
moisture that may lead to an infection. Spread a thin film of glue
on your little fingernail, place your new nail on top, cuticle end
first, then press down. Does that feel good? Now do the same finger
on your other hand and work your way across your hand. I find it
easier to do my thumbs before my index fingers. File off the rough
edges, often at the tip, working gentle strokes from the sides
towards the centre from slightly below.
Now admire your work. I bet even active length nails are a shock,
aren't they, sissy? Drum your nails on a hard surface. Do you feel
feminine? Now you will realise what we women go through in the name
of glamour. No more pulling ring-pulls with your fingers; use a
knife to lever up the tab. No more making a fist; you have to extend
the final joint of your fingers so you don't stab your palm. How
will you fasten your shoelaces? Now you see why Most women's shoes
are slip-ons. Ankle-strap sandal buckles are a torture that could
only have been designed by a man! Most feminising of all, see how
much more difficult it is to put on pantyhose; this is what it is
REALLY like to dress as a woman, being careful not to put any one of
ten, long, sharp talons straight through the delicate, filmy nylon
as you gently guide it up your legs and over your buttocks, holding
it between your finger pads rather than grabbing a fistful like the
man you pretend to be. To make sure you appreciate this, you will
wear pantyhose for the duration of your time in nails. A real
challenge would be to have you fastening garter tabs, but that tends
to be a once or twice a day thing and I want you to remember your
nails every time you sit to pee (you do sit, don't you, sissy?), so
pantyhose it is.

Your nails will drive you mad but I bet you will be horny as hell.
After 48 hours, I guarantee that you will have had enough, but as
soon as you take them off, you will want them back again. By all
means, enjoy the sensation of long nails if you masturbate but you
MUST NOT cum.

Do you worry that your French manicure looks impossible to hide?
You'll be surprised, sissy. How often do you notice someone's nails
in a crowd? I once stood behind a guy in a shop queue and only
realised he had long red nails when he handed over his purchases and
I'm someone who looks for these things. Your subtle, French manicure
is very passable for, say, a shopping trip. Which is what you are
going to do. Wear whatever you want but no gloves and you are not
allowed to put your hands in your pockets - never mind being
cowardly, it will ruin your manicure. The best mindfuck would be
totally male appearance, but I'll leave it to you. You must do three
of the following:
- Go to a department store and browse the pantyhose racks. You must
flick through the packets as you browse, so that your nails are on
show. Buy the sheerest pair available in your size. For extra
humiliation, as you pay, ask the assistant where the toilets are,
explaining your new nails put a a run in your pantyhose and you need
to change. Be careful not to put a run in your new pantyhose, or
you'll have to go back to buy another pair!
- Wander the cosmetics aisles, taking out at least three bottles of
red nail polish. Choose at least one to buy. What do you think the
assistant will think of a guy with immaculately manicured, long
nails buying nail polish?
- buy a women's fashion magazine.
- Go to a coffee shop and have a coffee and a bite to eat.
- Go to a bar and order a woman's drink; white wine and soda, gin
and tonic, Baileys. Make sure you finish your drink before you leave.
- Travel on public transport, resting your hands lightly crossed on
your thighs, palms down, like a woman.
- If you are a smoker, smoke at least three cigarettes in public
(assuming you're allowed to do so in your country). Hold the
cigarette between your extended index and middle fingers, like a
woman.
- Go to a nail salon and ask their advice on how to remove glued
nails.
- Go to a nail salon and ask for a pedicure, or a (quicker and
cheaper) shape and polish for your toenails.

Good luck, sissy. Submit your report. Only then may you cum. If you
cum with nails on, you must drink your filthy emission and add a
further 24 hours to your task for each orgasm. Is that clear, sissy?

What I'm wearing.

2009-06-30T14:14:00.000-07:00

From the top:
Blonde pageboy wig
Pink turtleneck.
40 J bra with formw glued on. They are really heavy.
Pink cincher.
Hot pink panties, under Sheer Vitaliy suntan pantyhose.
Black mini skirt.
5" open toed pink heels.

Oh, red (sorry!) nails on fingers and toes.

It's hard to type with these things on and hard to do much when my boobs get in the way.

Sympathy for the women with long nails and huge boobs.

Running in pantyhose.

2009-06-30T08:21:00.000-07:00

This incident did NOT happen to me, but encouraged me to look into the item at the end of the story (I don't want to say what, because it will ruin the re-telling). This is all from memory; it was posted on a pantyhose site, but the site erased messages which hadn't been commented on in several months. My memory isn't perfect, as always, but I try my best.

This woman had posted on some personal boards when looking for a match that the man would have to how to touch up his lips before he could kiss hers. But at the time when this incident happened, she didn't have quite the same forthrightness to determine if a guy would be a good match and have the same interests as her. So she would conduct certain tests to see how a guy would respond.

At the time, she was a college student, in good shape, and a gymnast. This meant her muscles were generally in good shape. She also discovered that she loved pantyhose, the way they felt on her legs and the way her legs looked and attracted others.

Her athletic then-boyfriend used to do his running in the early morning. He asked if she would go running with him, and although the distance was challenging (she was a gymnast, remember) she could complete it. She convinced him to wear nude pantyhose with her when running, implying that it would make him feel good and might help with his time.

The first few days went without incident. She would put the pantyhose on him, the nude hose were barely noticable, and they would run together. His times were slowly improving, and they enjoyed the morning runs.

The next day, he came to her room to get changed. They would normally get dressed with minimal lights on, and this day was no exception. However, she didn't put the regular pantyhose on him, but a slightly different pair. She then had some reason why she couldn't go running with him that morning, but he should do his normal run.

A woman's athletic team was waiting for the bus to take them to an away event, and when he ran by them, he received hoots, whistles, and cries of "nice legs!" and more. He felt flushed and embarrased by these but continued his run, and returned to her room later that morning, letting her know about the athletic team's comments.

However, after that day, he never called her or got together again with her. She think she knew why.

That day, she had put him in nude pantyhose with a black backseam.

As an afterword, when this happened, she had a live-in boyfriend, and they both wore pantyhose all the time. Initially, she started to have him wear it so that he could understand what she felt all day, and once she got him into the hose, he fell for it like a duck to water. She was the dominant one most of the year, although several days, he was allowed to "do" anything he wanted to her; on one of those times, they went horseback riding together, she wearing pantyhose - and nothing else.

Cable out.

2009-06-30T06:54:00.000-07:00

Our cable and internet service went out yesterday. I had to call up the cable company and get it repaired, and needless to say, couldn't continue with the games. It's working now (see this blog post) and we'll see how things go from here.

24 hours.

2009-06-28T13:18:00.000-07:00

I took time Saturday to shave my upper body and attach my 40D forms. They didn't present much of a problem until about 15 minutes later, when I realized the weight on my chest was a bit heavier than I had remembered. A white bra held the forms in place and provided a bit of support for me, although my back felt otherwise.

Sleeping in the forms was an experience. I didn't notice them much until I woke up, when I remembered the mounds on my chest poking up, with aroused nipples peaking through. That was an interesting wake up call.

We'll see how things go tonight.

Regular updates coming this week!

2009-06-26T04:57:00.000-07:00

I'll be posting daily updates this week starting with Saturday or Sunday.

I'll also have some time to try the results of that poll.

Should be fun, ask any questions if you'd like!

Foot and poll.

2009-06-10T05:20:00.000-07:00

Thanks for the people who responded to my previous poll. I had hoped the anonymity would provide many people the chance to reply, but it didn't. Thanks for those who did respond.

Unfortunately, I injured my foot several days before so I wasn't able to do much of anything. It's healed nicely for the most part, and I'll take the ideas from that poll around the end of the month.

My wife and I haven't had small fun lately. Kids, work, and various sicknesses and injuries have taken all of our time. That's a bummer, but just the way it goes.

Thanks for continuing to read even if I've been absent for a bit.

What should I wear?

2009-05-18T07:23:00.000-07:00

I'm going to have some time alone in a couple weeks and want to know what should I wear for these days. I'd appreciate comments, of course, but if you just want to add your voice to the poll, that's fine too.

This will be done only indoors, sorry, and nothing permanent.

Here's what I'm looking for help with:

Makeup
Day clothes (Panties will be required, determined by clothing)
Night clothes
Breast forms (bras will be determined by size of forms)

I'll be putting the polls up shortly, as soon as I can today, so thanks in advance!

Comments on the clothes I mentioned: (if I can find other shots, I'll post them)

The plunging neckline nightgown looks close to this:
http://www.womanwithin.com/clothing/Comfort-Choice-Silky-soft-tricot-Full-sweep-waltz-gown.aspx?PfId=52450&DeptId=16257&ProductTypeId=1&PurchaseType=0

Macy's experience.

2009-04-28T11:06:00.000-07:00

This is a repost of events which happened several years ago. I was NOT involved with this in any way.

The background: Guy has phone mistress. She (and members from a board they were on) give him an assignment. Fun ensues!

I've changed the names slightly with *** after their real names. Ms.T =Mistress, B*** = the person who this happened to :)

B***: Yes, this actually happened, this week. I repeat my heartfelt thanks to everyone involved, especially spanky, for the original idea!

Ms.T and I have collaborated on this story to bring both our perspectives on what happened Thursday.

Bad, bad S*** had this marvelous idea! I definitely wanted to play. Being at the mercy of a group of Dommes and subs was a concept that had definite appeal.

That morning, when I was getting dressed for work, the butterflies in my stomach
were already active. There was no “red bra underneath a sheer, white shirt” going
on, and I was glad. “Maybe next time”, I thought. Thank goodness, not today, realizing that in Games to come, the participants would be much more bold.

I had purposely chosen a rather simple humiliation fantasy, not knowing how extreme the participants might be. This was going to be trying enough, as it was. The pink bra and matching panties, the pink stockings (actually, fuschia) and garter belt. And no socks allowed. Ms. T knew what she was doing, indeed.

The work day was typical, with one exception. Bra straps. (Well, and having fuschia stockings on, which meant crossing legs was out of the question). And, damn it, when I left this very important business meeting, I unconsciously reached under my shirt and pulled a bra strap back into place (you ladies know what I’m talking about). I didn’t give it a second thought, until I turned around and saw who was watching.

It was D***, a high-powered IP (intellectual property) lawyer. She’s a shark, to be sure, but also fun and playful (at least with me). And once I’d adjusted that strap, she gave me a playful smile. Does she know? I can’t tell. But the image lingers. She knows what I was doing…after all, it’s a unique movement, isn’t it?

All women know what that is, that move. They’ve done it themselves, hundreds of times. I blushed, profusely, when I realized she saw me do it Will she mention it to me, I don’t know. We’ll see.

I spoke with Ms.T on the way to Macy’s. She had me bring my breast forms to work, for a reason. Yes, I knew why. It’s just that, in the car, on the way to the store, I wasn’t sure I could actually do it. But I had no choice in the matter.

Ms.T : Well, what was the point of wearing a bra if you didn’t have something to put in the cups? You see, B*** was going shopping for makeup, and we all know that only girls wear makeup. And girls have breasts. So it was only natural...

I instructed B*** to take her cell phone along. I wanted to make sure she told the cosmetics woman the right things.

B***: The Cosmetics Department was buzzing! I happened to go there right during the lunch hour, so there were so many women on their lunch breaks, shopping for lipsticks, perfumes, mascaras and the like.

And there was me. In stockings and a garter belt, a bra. And breast forms.

Fortunately, the shirt had a prominent pattern that helped conceal what was underneath. It wasn’t completely effective at doing so, however. I was extremely nervous, my heart pounding.

Good grief, there were so many women! And the women behind the counters were so, well, so perfectly made-up. Overwhelming.

So I perused the counters, saw who was busy, and chose the tall redhead at the Lancome counter. She had to be almost six feet tall, her hair pulled back into a bun, and not at all afraid of wearing makeup, if you know what I mean. The name on her badge said “M***”. So I introduced myself.

She was very pleasant, smiling broadly as I approached the counter. She was absolutely stunning. “May I help you?” she asked, warmly.

“Yes,” I replied, “I need to purchase two lipsticks and a mascara.” There, I said it. But she saw through me right away.

She looked a bit askance at me when she asked, “Are these for your wife?”

“No, they’re for me.”

“Ah, I see” she acknowledged, a mischievous grin joined her knowing eyes as she led me to the lipstick area. “What shades are you interested in?” I was ragingly erect at this point, and I could feel a drop of pre-cum beginning to form. As Ms.T instructed, I told her that one shade needed to be red, the other had to match the color of my bra. I unbuttoned my shirt a little to show her the little pink satin confection I was wearing underneath.

It was only then, I think, that she noticed the bulges underneath my shirt. “My, you’re quite well-endowed, aren’t you?” she said, with a little giggle.

I thought I was going to die! Under different circumstances, I’d be more than happy to hear those words coming from a gorgeous creature like M***…commenting on my manhood that way! This was different. She was commenting on my breasts. And here I was, among all these women, about to purchase makeup, for me.

We began looking at different lipsticks, pulling-out the little tubes, twisting them to reveal the color, comparing one with the other, that sort of thing. When we couldn’t decide between two reds, I decided it was time to call Ms.T

Ms.T : I asked to speak to M***. B*** was a good girl and had already told M***, as per my instructions, that she wanted to find two tubes of lipstick that would match her coloring and her bra. I instructed B*** to wear her pink bra and breast forms (C cup) and to unbutton her shirt a bit, hook her bra strap, and get it out to show M***. This way M*** could appraise B***'s coloring and the pretty pink bra and pick good shades. I wanted a red shade and a pink shade. M*** picked out Ambrette (brownish red) and Champagne (pink). Both shades sounded pretty!

M*** was very sweet. I could tell she wasn't quite sure what to think, but she was very professional. I asked her if B*** did indeed say she wanted two complimenting shades of lipstick. Yes, B*** did. I asked if B*** showed M*** her bra strap. She confirmed B*** had done so. I also told her these two lipsticks were for a monthly project. You see, B*** is supposed to use up two tubes of lipstick every month. M*** and I giggled at how silly that was. What woman can use up one tube of lipstick a month...let alone two!?!

So, as M*** went about searching the drawers for the new lipsticks - after the shades were picked out, I spoke to B*** again. She needed more mascara - she must use up a tube a month, and I picked out a turquoise. Next came some glitter stuff; I wanted B*** to glitter. So M*** picked out a brush-on glitter powder. I instructed B*** to say she wants her cleavage to glitter. I heard M*** say "Oh!"

B***: By this time, my clit had found it’s way outside my panties, pointing straight down my leg. (I know, it’s disgusting, but it grows so large it simply can’t be contained in panties…so it takes the path of least resistance). I could feel the pre-cum dripping down my thigh. I shuddered as I did my best not to present such an obscene picture to those around me.

Ms.T : Apparently there was a woman there staring at B***'s breasts. C-cups are rather hard to hide, even if you're wearing a loose dress shirt.

B***: She was a blonde, maybe 30 years old, shopping at the counter next to us. Long, straight hair, a black mini-skirt, black hose and high heels. Seeing her staring at me didn’t help matters much between my legs.

Ms.T : B*** was instructed to find some baby blue eyeliner for me, so she went over to one of the other cosmetics counters, but they didn't have any. It was so funny because the whole time, I was asking her if she was excited. "Yes." Rock hard? "Yes." Wearing your suit jacket? "No." OMG! How are you hiding it? "It's not easy." Luckily she wears pleated pants to hide that very unsissy-sized "member."

I asked B*** to make sure she sprayed herself with two perfumes at the counter - one on each wrist - to see which one she liked better. That way she'll know what to get next time she visits!

B***: Ms.T told me to try-on one of the new lipsticks, using the mirror at the counter. At that point, M*** surrendered any semblance of decorum and began laughing out loud. As I was leaving, she thanked me and said, “I hope you enjoy them?” I know, for certain, that this visit was a topic of conversation among the ladies in Cosmetics later that day.

Ms.T : In the car, B*** told me that she was so excited that her pad fell out of her pink panties, and she was dripping down her leg. Such a silly sissy. Maybe next time she needs to wear the belted maxis!

Exciting experience

2009-04-10T09:03:00.000-07:00

I needed to run some errands in a neighboring town one day. No problem, or so I thought. What wound up happening was quite the eventful and memorable day.

My wife asked me to give her a call when I had finished picking things up. Oh, I forgot; it was moderately warm, so I was wearing shorts. That will come into play later.

I drove about 20 minutes from home and completed my errands and called her. She told me to go in the trunk of the car, bring out what was in there, and then put it on except for the sweat pants and jacket. She also said after that to carefully read the envelopes in the bag, and follow the instructions to the letter.

In the bag was the following: a pair of sweat pants and jacket, a white blouse, black denim skirt, a pair of purple panties, a sealed pair of Leggs Sheer Energy suntan control top pantyhose, a pair of socks with the little ball on the back, a mini-slip, a padded purple bra (38DD) and a pair of breast forms which were larger than the bra.

I gulped. This was definitely different, and I started sweating. First, I've got to find somewhere that's a little less crowded. I go to a street which wouldn't be busy and park. OK, back to the front of the car. I take off my shorts and socks, and put on the panties and then the pantyhose. I was feeling excitement and yet shaking, so it took a bit longer than normal to slide the pantyhose up my legs. Then, I put the slip on, the skirt, and the socks with the ball on the back.

How was I going to do the rest of this? I ducked down low, took off my shirt, and put the bra on. That was a bit of a struggle. The forms proved to be even harder; I had to finagle them in the bra. Then, I put the white blouse on. I took a look in the rear view mirror.

The purple bra was quite clearly visible through the blouse. Even though the bra was padded, I partially rued the day that I got the extra nipples for the forms; they were showing through! Looking down, the skirt ended a few inches above my knee. If the person in the mirror were female and had a good face, I'd want to jump on her right now. I was feeling both excited and embarrassed, and figured I should open the envelopes, which were numbered 1, 2 and 3.

The first envelope was a note partly mocking me for getting so excited over women's lingerie, and what a sissy I was. It instructed me to open a couple buttons on the blouse (to show your cleavage; after all, you like looking down my shirt, she said), and put on my sneakers. She also said I was to take special notice when I put my seat belt on, about how my chest would stand up and be even more noticable.

After I did this, I opened the second envelope. This one included a tube of bright red lipstick and some tissues with the note. She said she wanted me to enjoy myself, this afternoon, and that when I arrived home later, I was to have signs of having completely "enjoyed" myself down below. She said the lipstick might just show how much of a sissy I was. If I did that by the time I got home, I could put on the sweat pants and jacket, wipe the lipstick off with the tissues, and come on inside. If not, I'd have to park in the street and come in as I was.

Since she didn't want me to get in an accident, she suggested finding a place to find some time alone (If there wasn't one, you can come home and park in the garage, but I think you'll find it more enjoyable if you don't do it that way). So, I had to start driving and thinking.

Meanwhile, one of my hands was creeping under my skirt - my skirt! and moving around slowly down there.

Finally, I found a place where I'd be safe about 10 minutes from home, back of a parking lot. The third note made some suggestions for what I should do (put on the lipstick, play with your boobs and dream that they were hers, feel up the nylons and remember what a sissy you are) and needless to say, it was all too much to take.

I wiped off the lipstick and drove carefully home. When I got home, I put on the pants and jacket and went inside. My wife gave me a kiss, felt up my ass and front on the inside, and asked if I had a very good day, with a sparkle in her eyes.

You bet!

Purple was the color

2009-04-05T15:50:00.001-07:00

of my bra and panty set that I wore a while ago.

There, that will force me to tell the entire story either Monday or Tuesday. It was one of my most exciting and humiliating times, within the confines of our play rules.

More boobage.

2009-03-25T07:49:00.000-07:00

I promised I'd tell more about my experience with breast forms.

My first actual purchase, which I forgot about, was actually a padded form made of cloth. It was made of material you might use for sewing, and looked and felt so unrealistic. I tossed it out soon after, and figured there were no other way to affordably "have" breasts.

I mentioned the FOH ones in an earlier post. The ones from Glamour Boutique were above and beyond anything I had used, balloons, the FOH ones, or cloth forms, etc. They've lasted a few years, unfortunately there was a hole in them which I couldn't patch so I had to get rid of them.

There are many kinds of silicone forms now on the market. It's hard to tell whether they are good or not without testing them in your hand. Some forms aren't squeezable (on the front), some have a solid back which is uncomfortable against the chest. The better ones, which run a few hundred dollars, have a back which warms to your skin and can adjust to your chest.

I have three sizes of forms. Sizes are approximate for my bras, since I've found it varies from person to person. I have a 40D, a 40DDD/G, and a 40K.

Yes, that's K. Those are the "Skeeter Bites" forms, which are HUGE. They're a little more than 5 pounds EACH, stick out far from the chest, and are very, VERY obvious. Wearing these is difficult - and exciting.

The ironic part is if I wore the "smaller" ones out and had something to pull my stomach in a little, they'd be very noticable.

The unfortunate part is that my wife doesn't like me wearing the forms any more. She has no problems if I wear them when I'm alone, just usually not when we're playing together. She'll still have me wear them periodically, but it's dropped off over time. I respect her wishes, because she tolerates so much which can be considered different.

(EDIT: There should now be some pictures of the Skeeters)

Vacation

2009-03-09T09:52:00.001-07:00

Will be off on a week's vacation. There will be no exciting stories from the time off, but I should be back in the swing of things when I get back next Thursday or Friday.

Hosed up!

2009-03-08T07:54:00.000-07:00

My wife nudged me this morning and said "I think you should wear your pantyhose to keep you excited all day."

I don't have to say any more, do I?

Slave to a bra.

2009-03-06T06:03:00.000-08:00

I first read this one years ago and thought it was posted on the newsgroups, deja.com I believe skip just reposted it, but I can't find the original.

http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=246890

I'm not into the cuckold thing, but the rest of it really gets to me.

What do you think?

The boob tube!

2009-03-06T05:38:00.000-08:00

I've always liked breasts. The way they add curves to a woman's shape just drives me crazy. The breasts don't have to be huge, but I like them large to a woman's body. If there was a 5'0, 100 lb. woman, a B with a small butt, C with a medium butt would be great for me. I know the average woman that size would likely be an A cup, that's what I meant when I said I like them large compared to her body.

I first tried Nerf balls, which didn't look good. Later, I tried water balloons, which bounced (too much!) but looked much more realistic. I was always afraid of them breaking.

I heard about breast forms, and my (now-wife) was OK with me getting them. I ordered from Frederick's of Hollywood, either a D or DD cup (for my 5'9 body), worried it might be too large - and being disappointed when they were very small! Why? Because the breast forms are made for women, who already have some boobage, and I had none. You basically have to add 1-2 cup sizes to change the normal breast forms sizing to male, so I was getting something which was a B or C cup on my body. And roughly, a 34DD = 36D = 38C (though they won't sit the same way on a person) and my sizing was 38 to 36.

I returned them and eventually ordered a larger pair from Glamour Boutique. These worked out well, they were real D cup, and gave me a shape. When we played, my wife would tease and taunt me about "my boobs" and "my bra" and "Wouldn't you like to have boobs like mine, but you'll just have to play with yours?". She'd sometimes snap my bra, just because she could. And "Since you enjoy large breasts so much, it's only fair that you have your own rack."

We didn't do this a lot, but it was great fun for me when we did. I admit I enjoy the thrill and private humiliation of it all, sometimes having to wear a bra and breast forms just to be able to touch her breasts? It's got to be hard for the people who "need" it more often than I do. But I do know that women don't realize the control they can have over their man with a bra and the threat of forms.

I'll talk about my other sets of breast forms next time, link to a bra slave story, and some other things like that.

Anyone out there?

2009-03-03T07:29:00.000-08:00

I've lost inspiration to post, any ideas? Anyone out there?

Future areas.

2009-02-17T06:14:00.000-08:00

When I have time, I'm going to write up a couple posts on breast forms and one of my most exciting times. If anyone has any ideas, questions or otherwise please let me know!

All things are mine and true unless I post otherwise.

Words and mind.

2009-02-17T05:55:00.000-08:00

Haven't had time to blog lately, hope that will change.

I'm not an expert on dressing in women's clothes, but I have talked with some people online about their experiences. I corresponded online with one woman whose husband was a crossdresser. She first learned about it while they were dating, when he told her he had something to show her - and pulled down his pants, revealing the panties and pantyhose he was wearing. He had the same fears I did when I told my then-girlfriend (that she'd want to break up with me) but she was also OK / tolerant of it.

Her question wasn't along those lines, but he was looking for her to be more dominant at times in their relationship, and she wasn't sure how to do that or if she could do that. I'm guessing her vision was of the dominatrix with whips and chains, she was clear she didn't want to hurt him. She also didn't want to do things in public which might reflect badly on her.

We did talk about what she was comfortable with and what he wanted. She had taken him out fully dressed one Halloween to another town, where he passed to some of the people. They were both shaved head to toe (except his arms) and she progressed to the point where he now had to wear panties every day, even in the styles he didn't like so much. She also had him dress up sometime around the house and clean up so she could have relaxing time, and when dressed, he had to sit down in the bathroom as her bitch. I joked that she had plenty of experience under her belt already, why ask me about things?

Her issue was what to do or say to fulfill his need to be submissive outside, where she felt bad about making him do things. And I thought about things that my wife has done, using two of the most sensual tools - voice and mind.

I let her know about some of the things my wife has done. She's uncomfortable doing things that are in charge, but she knows just saying things can get me going. If I'm wearing a bra in the bedroom, she'll snap it, just because she can, so "You know how it feels to have your bra snapped". If I'm wearing panties and pantyhose during the day, sometimes she'll snap them, or she'll put her hand down there, "Just to make sure you're wearing your woman's panties" or "Your smooth pantyhose". It instantly gets me going, which is the mind part.

There's some things that might be real exciting, but unfeasible for us to do. So she'll say "What if I did...." and that might get me going as well.

That actually hit the sweet spot with her - she could still be in charge, get a rise out of him, AND stay discreet. I didn't think it was a brainstorm, but it worked. The first thing she did was take him out while they went shopping together, and through the lingerie area. She was taking some panties off the rack and out of the drawers and would hold them up, then if no one was around, hold them at his waist area, telling him "I wonder if these would look as good on you as the ones you're wearing now."

She told me that his reaction was priceless, he got quite red, stammered, and instantly visibly aroused. And that got her going a little bit more, she told him that she was going to pull his panties up a little bit in the back, hopefully they wouldn't show? "Don't bend over too far, or everyone might see your pretty panties". She also had him look through the panty drawers for a couple minutes by himself, as she went elsewhere so she could watch him and his reaction. She also told him if a saleslady came over to ask him if he needed help, he had to say yes and let her know his size. He didn't have to tell her the panties were for him, but he did have to accept her assistance. Unfortunately, no one came over to help, but that was the first of her experiences. Probably her best experience, because it was their first and opened her eyes to things she could do.

So, ladies, if your guy does get turned on by things like this, there are plenty of ways to be discreet and get him wrapped around your finger.

Panties.

2009-02-04T07:09:00.001-08:00

Men have underwear, boxers, or briefs. Women have panties.

I didn't really care much about panties at first because my first exposure to them was the boring, white cotton panties. Big deal, I thought.

It took one time to be with a girl who wasn't wearing boring ones, but different - satin panties that were some special color. I don't even remember which color, but when I would grab her ass, the material felt so smooth, it immediately got to me.

That was the start of things. Most of the women I was with knew that I'd spend extra time caressing their ass or their breasts especially if they had good material around there, and I'd sometimes get asked if I wanted to feel it closer. Of course I said yes, they'd usually rub it around in my crotch area. I found one panty-girdle which wasn't a real girdle, but was tight in the crotch, that I especially liked.

There was one time an ex-girlfriend of mine was around - we remained friends - and she was talking with another friend of hers about the things they were doing with their boyfriends, and my ex was inspired to dress her (current) bf in purple bra and panties, swearing me to secrecy. Unfortunately, she was one of the girlfriends who I didn't tell because I didn't think she'd take it the right way! Oh well.

I told my wife about my tendencies and likes early in our relationship, so there wouldn't be problems later on. She first indulged me by putting one pair of light blue panties in my top drawer, telling me that "I'd always think of her when I saw them there". Those became MY panties, she said, and I sometimes had to wear them to work under my suit. "Be careful other people don't know about my sissy" she'd tell me. I had to wear pantyhose or stockings sometimes as well, and that meant having to adjust my nylons and panties multiple times during the day.

My nylons, my panties. It gives me a rush even typing it.

She's also the one who encouraged my first breast form purchase, but that's for another time.

I've purchased panties and other lingerie for her, the unfortunate part is that she prefers cotton panties! However, she always wears the good-feeling ones when we're playing around, and has let me get some for myself. She recently gave me a pair she doesn't wear much anymore, a dark green Vassarette pair that clings. She put it in my drawer, and then told me to wear them all day so I'd think of her for our time at night.

My favorite ones are nylon and spandex; I don't really care for thongs as they can hurt and don't leave much to the imagination. I don't wear them all the time, but I have gotten hooked on panties.

Staying fit!

2009-02-01T06:12:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was my first day of my new exercise attire. It included low socks, pantyhose, pink panties, pink leotard, and 38DDD bra holding in my breast forms. Also some fuschia lipstick, blush and a blond wig.

I was able to do my rhythm dance routine without a problem. The jogging routine was a bit much. My boobs kept bouncing, the wig kept coming in my face, the sensations of the lipstick and pantyhose, it all made me crazy. Would I love to see a woman dressed like this and jogging? Of course! But the humiliaton that I was dressed like this instead drove me crazy.

I couldn't finish the course and had to lie down to take a break. I'll try again soon. Any suggestions?

Getting fit!

2009-01-28T09:43:00.000-08:00

I could lose a few pounds. Many of us probably can.

We recently got a Wii and the Wii Fit, which seems like a great way to get in shape. There's yoga, aerobics, balance and more.

Some of the games include rhythm dancing and rhythm boxing, free stepping, and free running.

I will be playing these games soon to get in shape. But I will have a couple hours alone two days a week, and those days, the dress code will be a little different.

Dress code will be: Short white socks that end at the ankles. Pantyhose and panties. A pink aerobics leotard. A touch of lipstick. And a bra. And I won't be weighing myself during those days.

Why not? Because the 40DD/38DDD forms will add 4 pounds to my body. I have a feeling those will give me something else to look at during my exercising.

Not my story, but a great read.

2009-01-27T07:42:00.000-08:00

First, thanks for the people who have emailed and commented here, I'm glad that people are reading and appreciative of my experiences. Those who emailed; as long as you're not spamming, profane or insulting, I'll publish the comments!

I'll be continuing with some of my first-time experiences, but I plan on posting stories from elsewhere, which (I think?) no longer appear on the Web. Here's one of them. This is not my experiences but that of m38dx - if you're out there, m38, please let me know!

The actual piece went longer, but here's the first part of it.

This true story will be posted in several parts:

My georgeous wife always gets excited by gambling and public humiliation of me. Nothing excites her more than combining the two in a hotel gambling casino.

We checked into the hotel in the late afternoon,showered, and began to get dressed for an evening's fun and games.

My wife brought an incredibly sexy 1950's Marilyn Monroe type dress for her to wear. Green satin, very low plunging neckline, almost backless,with a relatively short skirt bottom. She wore no bra or panties.She said that she brought only one pair of panties for tonight, and I will be wearing them. She wore a garter belt and stockings though, and very high silver heels. With her very large 38D breasts in that plunging neckline dress, to say she would attract attention to herself, and thereby to me, would be an understatement.

I was given shocking pink panties with white and blue little flowers and frilly pink lace around the waist and leg openings. I figured that this won't be too humiliating as I was wearing black pants over them. She was going to let me get away easy the first night we were here. How wrong I was !

After she put on her make-up with cherry red MM lipstick, my wife asked me for my wallet. She took out cash, a credit card,and my ID and told me to put the wallet in the room safe.

From her drawer she pulled out a relatively small sequined red handbag with long over the shoulder thin straps. I was told to put my change in the bottom, then my credit card,then the cash and ID. Next I put a make-up compact of hers, a small vial of perfume, a lipstick, a frilly handerkerchief, a pair of green nylon panties ( in case she felt she needed them ) and two tampons on top. The small bag was very full.

I figured that she was getting off on being in complete charge of our money tonight. It was only after she went back to her drawer and took out a silver handbag for herself, that I realized that the ultra femminine sequined red handbag was for me for the entire evening. My humiliation would be centered around that handbag.

We left the hotel room, and as we walked to the elevator, I tried to find a way to carry the bag as unobtrusively as possible.I was hoping that people would think that I was just carrying it for my wife, but she had her own silver handbag that she was carrying. My wife ordered me to wear it slung over my shoulder on the thin "spaghetti" strap for all to see that I was a handbag carrying sissy.

At dinner the waiter was having a good time looking down my very sexy wife's cleavage from behind her. To embarass me she flirted with him non-stop. He kept looking at me and the red sequined handbag that I put on the table when we walked in. he then noticed my wife's little silver bag and gave me a questioning look. When our dinner was over she told me to call the waiter over and get the check.When he came over, she bent down toward
him, ostensibly to fix her shoe, and gave him a complete view of her tits--nipples and all. Her "Marilyn Monroe" dress was designed to show off a womens breasts.

She looked me straight in the eye and said"pay the man honey,use your credit card".

At first I thought "of course". then I realized where my card was; at the bottom of my purse.I asked,"can't I just sign for it to our room?", and got an emphatic "no!".

My wife had two red faced humiliated men. The waiter for being caught staring at her tits, and me for knowing that I would have to go thru my purse to get my credit card. I tried to slip my hand down the side of the bag to retrieve the card, but to no avail. My wife insisted that I empty the bag on the table to get the card as the waiter stood there fascinated.I wished that I could fall into a hole, but out came the tampons; out came the bright green nylon panties;the frilly handkerchief;the make-up; and then I found the credit card which I gave to the waiter.He seemed just as glad to leave for the moment. I was told by my wife to leave everything out on the table until I get my card back.

He must have told others because waiters and waitresses kept walking by to view my humiliation. When he brought back my card,he and a waitress watched me return all the items to the purse. My wife sat there and giggled at my embarassment.

As we got up to leave,I picked up my handbag--The humiliating symbol of my being feminized by my wife.

As we walked out of the restaurant, I had an obvious hard-on in my panties that my wife called to my attention saying,
"That really got to you didn't it"?

YOU BET IT DID!!!

Minor delay.

2009-01-27T04:19:00.000-08:00

I had a few things get in the way. Today or tomorrow, I'll post a story I read a few years ago which had to be fabulous for both people involved.

Breasts and water balloons

2009-01-22T08:15:00.000-08:00

My last post talked about my interest in pantyhose. When I started dating, I discovered I preferred women with larger breasts. I was with women from A to DD and all cup sizes in between and just enjoyed larger ones more. I wasn't looking for any entertainment starlets - thin, waif-like women, either with or without boobs - just someone who had some curves. There was one girl I dated who was not overweight but short and had a large frame, and was embarrassed by the size of her breasts. I felt terrible for her, since she had to go through teasing and much more about her natural beautiful body.

When a women would show her brastrap, it would almost always catch my attention. There's just something about seeing it - not cotton, not yellow, but almost any other material - that would drive me crazy. I got the mental hint soon enough: bras could do almost as much to me as pantyhose.

One time, I was in the laundry room and saw a bra in the garbage can. But this one was big, bigger than I had ever seen before. The material had started getting a little flimsy, but it was a white-tan bra, with some satin and lace, in 36DDD. I washed that, and then stored it in my collection.

I got to use that bra later with a friend from another school who I told of my fetishes. She was nearly flat, but cute and friendly. She went to class while I waited in her room, and she had left me a note which told me to fill 2 water balloons enough to fill in that bra, and to put on the bra, pantyhose, and be waiting for her. When she came back, she was fully made-up, got on top of me, and talked about maybe having me stay the night. But, since it was an all-girls dorm, I'd have to be one of the girls. I'd have to learn how to do my makeup, and "My, isn't your chest large? It must be real difficult to find bras in your size", and other assorted teasing like that. All the while, I was making her extremely happy, and we had a wonderful time. It wasn't something that could be a relationship, but was good for both of us.

Speaking of water balloons. T

Publish Post

his was an earlier story, I had never tried on a bra before, and was fooling around with one girl who, since I was feeling her breasts through her bra, decided to wrap her bra on me. It was a little tight, I don't think she was too comfortable with it, and had taken it off. But we had gotten some water balloons, she put them in for a moment, laughed about it, and then took them off. I asked her to put them back in, which she did briefly, then took them out. We had gotten the balloons to try something else out - we put them inside the hose we were wearing, put towels on the tiled floor, and wrestled around in them, trying to pop them. That was pretty neat, but popping balloons full of water is rather hard!

The start of pantyhose

2009-01-21T07:36:00.000-08:00

When I was in high school, girls were still wearing pantyhose. I knew how good they could make a girl's legs look when they wore heels and a skirt, but there was one memorable incident. I sat next to one girl in class who was wearing socks, sneakers, a skirt and had the most amazing legs. It wasn't until I sat down that I realized she was wearing pantyhose, and that's what made her legs look great. After that, I became more aware of how awesome legs looked when in pantyhose.

At some point, I saw a pair of pantyhose on the ground. I picked them up and they felt nice to the touch. I've since learned that there are lots of kinds of pantyhose which are kind of like sandpaper, but these were some high-end brand and wow! I threw them in the woods and later went back there to see what they would feel like on my foot. I tried them, thought they were neat, but that was the end of it.

I found myself more interested in girls who were wearing pantyhose (most never wore stockings), and when I was dating a girl, would let her know with my touch that I liked hose. This meant she'd wear them more often, which worked great for me.

The first time I remember trying them on was in college. Girls would leave their pantyhose with runs in the laundryroom garbage can, and one time, I took a pair, washed it out, and tried it on. The feeling was quite incredible. I've read of people taking others' panties, pantyhose and more, but I don't believe in that.

That started a collection of clothes (more in another post) that I'd accumulate. I never "did" anything in the pantyhose for a while, but at some point, one of my girlfriends suggested I try on the pantyhose. She teased me with "If you like the feel of them on me, imagine how good they'd feel on you!" and she was right. From that point on, I realized I was hooked. I loved them on women, and I loved them on me.

My favorite kinds of pantyhose? L'eggs Sheer Energy and Sheer Vitality, and for more expensive ones, Wolford.

Even now, just the word pantyhose can get to me in the right situation. That will be another post as well.

Who am I?

2009-01-20T07:00:00.000-08:00

I'm a periodic crossdresser who likes some humiliation mixed in with it. My wife and I keep it mainly in the bedroom because we don't want our young children to have to figure things out.

I told my wife about my interests and fetishes before we got married. I felt it was only right, and didn't want to get in a situation that might lead to problems later on. She was ok with it because she cared about me the person.

We're monagamous and I have zero sexual interest in guys whether they're dressed or not. The main thing that defines a guy is between his legs and I find it ugly. I don't want to be a woman either; I'm happy the way I am. Breasts (and pantyhose) are a big interest, but that's for another post.

I'll read other people's blogs when I get time because it's good to know other people have variations on the same weird kinks as me. My posts here will be as accurate as I can remember them, but I sometimes forget things or exact events. There won't be any pictures of me in this blog. I don't even have any dressed, so there wouldn't be any point.

I've helped out a few people online (some female, some male) with their issues, ideas and other assorted questions. I'll try and answer questions, but I hope to explain my background and interests more in the next week and then talk about my experiences.

I never have a female name, even when dressed, but I'm changing it now to Jane.

Thanks for reading!

This is just the start

2009-01-13T06:24:00.001-08:00

I'll start posting later but I want to get the first one out of the way!